Monday 9 February 2009

< Begin rant >

“It could be worse”, is the official shitist saying on the face of the earth. Everybody knows that a minor upset is infinitesimal in comparison to some of the things people deal with on a daily basis, but it doesn't stop you feeling shit when they happen.

"It could be worse" No shit, even if both my legs fell off and a man came to begin inserting them up my ass while his kids poked me in the eyes with rolled up copies of a signed Jeremy Kyle photograph and then everyone I have ever known turns up laughing and pointing at me just in time to watch my clothes spontaneously combust leaving me rolling naked on the ground... IT COULD STILL BE FUCKING WORSE.

So please, if you are unfortunate enough to have to listen to me moaning about what ever shit has went wrong that day, please don't say "It could be worse."

<>

4 comments:

  1. It couldn't be worse. There's nothing worse than a signed photo of Jeremy Kyle, oh, wait, err, Jermey Kyle? I had a similar reaction to a Mika song once, comtemplated cutting off my ears, dipping them in acid and throwing them at him...Hope the mental image of this scenario cheers you up a bit...:o)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Hah, yeah see, no matter how hard you try there is always something slightly worse. It's like a perpetual motion device, it is always increasing and disobeying the laws of Thermodynamics.

    Thanks though, acid ears + Mika = hilarity.

    ReplyDelete
  3. It could be worse!!!!

    ReplyDelete